I'm hopeful for the future... no more of the stagnant blah. I've really had enough. I'm miserable the way things are right now.
It is hard not to be slightly down and depressed with the things happening around me.
No more... Seriously, no more...

I Was Broken
"Said I used to think the past was dead and gone
But I was wrong, so wrong
Whatever makes you blind must make you strong,make you strong
In my time I've melted into many forms
From the day that I was born,I know that there is no place to hide
Stuck between the burning shade and the fading light

I was broken for a long time
But it's over now"

I'll Be Your Lover Too by Rob Pattinson

[Here is a beautiful love song. Love it :)]


I'll be your man
And I'll understand
And I'll do my best
To take good care of you

You'll be my queen
I'll be your king
And I'll be your lover too
Yeah yeah

Yes I will

Derry down green
Color of my dream
A dream that's daily coming true.
And ohhh when the day is through
I will come to you and tell you of
Your many charms

And girl you look at me
With eyes that see
And we'll melt into each others eyes

You'll be my queen
And I'll be your king
And I'll be your lover too

My life is changing... I feel like I'm the verge of something. When will I be aware of what to do? Things are stagnant. I know that there are things that need to change, but when and what?
I love the idea that things are changing, but I scared at the same time.

Music is helping me through this transition period. You could sense the fickle emotions with the songs that I have completely worn out on my beloved iphone.

Hey, have I mentioned that since I began to get healthy 4 weeks ago, I have lost 8lbs? :) That's 2lbs a week. Its been an uphill battle for a month, but I'm so happy that its getting easier. Its not such a struggle to choose an apple over a bag of chips. It has really been a lifestyle change. Hopefully this time it will be permanent. I think it will since this time I'm doing it correctly. And, I've gotten Erick involved, though he is not always supportive of me... I'm strong enough to say no. :) "Just say no"
I've come to some realizations about my dependence on food... though I think that discussion will take place at another time. Its not really that important to me right now... its not really what I'm thinking about.

I'm happy I have tomorrow off. :) One of the many advantages of working for the county.

Monsters by Matchbook Romance

girl, what's come between you and me?
look right through me
i'll let it go
i can't help this feeling anymore
i would go anywhere
maybe you'll see

we are
we are the shaken (shaken)
we are the monsters (monsters)
underneath your bed
yeah
believe what you read
we are
we are mistaken (staken)
we are the voices (voices)
inside your head
yeah
believe what you see

it came as no surprise
you bring me back to life
believe me
you bleed for me
i'll bleed for you
i caught you walking through walls
drowned with applause
from the world that makes me crazy

we are
we are the shaken (shaken)
we are the monsters (monsters)
underneath your bed
yeah
believe what you read
we are
we are mistaken (staken)
we are the voices (voices)
inside your head
yeah
believe what you see
yeah

we are the monsters
we are the monsters
we are the monsters
underneath your bed
we are the voices
we are the voices
we are the voices
underneath your bed
we are the monsters
we are the monsters
we are the monsters
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

we are
we are the shaken (shaken)
we are the monsters (monsters)
underneath your bed
yeah
believe what you read
we are
we are mistaken (staken)
we are the voices (voices)
inside your head
yeah
believe what you see

we are
we are the shaken (shaken)
we are the monsters (monsters)
underneath your bed
yeah
believe what you see