How can anyone live with themself when all their flaws are constantly exposed and picked at? They are rubbed sore... I feel like I'm exposed but, God forbid anyone get a word in for once.
I'm not the only lowly crap on this earth. Everyone has a little crap floating around.... and for you, Erick, its how you deal with things that might not be fair... Have you ever tried a piece of humble pie?
I know you might think it... but, I'm not a horrible person... and though I'm not as angel like as stupid freaking Stephanie... neither are you. And the crazy thing is that you will never even know it because your final answer is that I talk to much because I disagree with you!
Stupid!

I'm broken and I can't fix myself

Sometimes, I feel like everyone has sucked every energy from my being dry. I'm just waiting to be refilled. Things are not perfect right now. I look at the world and I'm jealous that they can make it work but, I can't even get a simple dinner. I want there to be passion in my life. I want there to be a drive that could expel all other doubts. I'm so sick and tired of getting the short end... Just for once, can't I have it all and more?
"Pick me. Choose me. Love me" - Meredith Grey - Grey's Anatomy
I feel like laying in a ball and crying all day. I feel like bumping Dashboard and not moving from my bed. I feel to lazy to move.
And, I wish for once someone understood me. Even as vague as I'm being... I need, especially Erick, someone to really get my damage. I'm broken... and I can't fix myself. :(

ok last one I swear

As a side note... this is the third one in the past 2 hours because I'm at work and there is literally no one here!!

Crap... I forgot what I was going to write because I was interupted by yet another text, the ugly side of texting. :)

Oh yes... You know what I love? Last night, we had this conversation about how Mike would drive to San Diego to protect me if I ever needed him to. We talked for like an hour about how they would kill someone if I needed them to. I love my little protectors! Mike has sworn to me, as well as my brother, that if I seriously needed anything I could call them up. I'm not sure if I would call my brother to cry on his shoulder... but, I would definitely call Mike.

Another thing I was thinking of... Mike is such a dear friend of mine. Its so funny because he is probably the only dear friend I have never went any further. I never dated him... I might have had a minor crush on him way back when... but, really not anything to remember considering how insignificant it was.

any way... no one has come to work... I'm going to get lunch. I'm starving!! :)

The story of my life... Fortune Fish were awesome!

haha... I was just thinking... and believe me, this is far from any train of though but it originated from a conversation with Ben, which I'm still currently having through the beautiful invention called TEXTING!

I remember, to this day, the day that I learned what fickle ment. Hilarious! Does anyone remember those "Fortune Fish" http://www.fortunetellerfish.com/?gclid=CPXU5siz3I0CFRpohgod9CYGbA (here is a link if you don't know what they are)... Freaking Hilarious! I wish life was as easy as a fortune fish. Just like life would be easier if I could roll the Yoda dice I broke out of a Taco Bell kids meal magic eight ball thing that is still currently sitting in my letterman's jacket. Life would be splended if life were that easy.

When did life get so hard?
Meredith Grey: "We're adults. When did that happen? And how do we make it stop? "

I have a long history of disfunction and baggage. Why can't people accept that I am not anyone else but myself? Why can't people see that I can't be treated like everyone else because of my history? I'm a sensative person. Sometimes things hurt me more than they would hurt others... sometimes things soak in more than they do with others...
All I ask is for you to know me... and love me.
Everyone out there!